What is Joy (Part II).
Tony E Dillon-Hansen
February 2014
Mental Illness and depression make people wonder what you do when you are depressed. Some wonder what to do when you are depressed and how to alleviate the affliction that no one sees. Part II of this exploratory means to explore some of the diverse ways people experience depression. Again, I am speaking from my own experience, but hopefully, this dialogue will help others afflicted by depression to find opportunities.
We know that depression affects people of all stripes, stages, ages and opportunities. Yet, we compel ourselves to think of depression as dark, lonely corners and pin-striped attire with blank walls and motionless. This is an image of the social stigma attached to depression.
Depression is often accompanied by withdrawing from activities, friends and family. In severe cases, this can lead to total isolation and sometimes suicide. Yet, in these moments, some of the world’s greatest minds have found unique, perhaps utterly artistic or genius, explorations of science, mind and body as a result (sometimes directly). Some may consider this condition to be their “lot in life” as a result of poverty or some other tragedy in life and yet, do nothing to treat this. For many, these tragic experiences appear to come in multiples rather than as singular events.
I knew that there were different ways of thinking and treatment available. Depression could be a chemical or psychological condition, but there are emotional and spiritual elements that do not want to let go of the pain. I am also conscience of the idea that some of these professional “treatments” are destructive beyond the bad feelings to some people.
Aside from treatments, some believe that altering these feelings (specifically medicinally) as altering ones’ very being into some anatomic state of “normalcy”. Yet with this idea, we can wonder if the goal of treatment is to rid the world of ideas that could transform the society into merely something different. Artistic expression and apparently un-orthodox ideas may provoke others to improve society when the person holding the ideas could not understand the value of oneself. When you can hear your mind debating the merit of basic activities, complex ideas of physics, social behavior, or political systems may seem easy to comprehend in ways that some have never considered.
For these reasons, among many, I have become willing to speak out about some things that should be said. In some ways, I figured I had nothing to lose by issuing but I know the current process was making my condition much worse. The result has seen measurable process and management improvements. In my mind, maybe someone else or the whole company could find improvements rather than ignoring the issues.
The path of realizing one’s own pain journey may find many others also wounded as well because they happen to be in the path of the depression when the suffering person does not realize the pain they are pushing onto others. I know that I inflicted pain upon people when they appeared to “attack” at the core of my wounds instead of relieving them. Illusions can give someone many wrong emotions and impressions of what people are doing. Nevertheless, I cannot apologize enough to those whom I have injured regardless of how wrong or right I was.
I know, too well, what it is like to sit and to stare aimlessly and wonder if anyone cares or if anything matters. I know that most people go about their business in life and do not worry themselves about these things. Worthlessness is powerful feeling that bleeds enthusiasm away from your soul and into despair. Whitman's words, "The question, O me! so sad, recurring-What good amid these, O me, O life?", but without an answer. Yet, depression seems as a way, if anything for those able to tolerate the impacts, have become somewhat “resilient” regardless of how much we hide from it.
I agree with Andrew Solomon in a TED talk where he states, “Depression is so exhausting. It takes up so much of your time and energy, and silence about it, it really does make the depression worse”. Without intervention or treatment, that time consumed by depression is more exhausting and extensive. In his same address, he talks about how amazing that depression can be alleviated by people in most ridiculous ways “standing on your head” and only depressed people would understand or try just to alleviate their own affliction (that no matter how goofy the idea, you would be willing to give it a try.) Even an atheist may be willing to ask for divine intervention to escape from the torments, the horrors or from just being miserable.
I, like Mr. Solomon, agree to be grateful to be alive and that we live in the right time for figuring out depression. For me, I can see pictures of family and can see the pain in the eyes and wished I would have been able to help. Maybe, I could have understood more about my own torment.
Depression has been here and is here. Depression is more than occasional bad feelings but is a perpetual perception of being lost and useless with nothing you can do to change direction. Everything seems to have more negative effort and events can provoke awkward responses. Intoxicants can amplify this impression and people around the depression (guilty or not may be injured.)
Again, if you feel you need help, do not be afraid to seek help. If you know someone who needs help, let them know who you are in their life. Life is meant to be lived and hopefully through the struggle that some of us with depression have, we find dignity in the simple work we conduct or simply that we have meaning in this world for the people that count upon us. Let your light shine (Matthew 5:16)!
Tony E Dillon-Hansen
February 2014
Mental Illness and depression make people wonder what you do when you are depressed. Some wonder what to do when you are depressed and how to alleviate the affliction that no one sees. Part II of this exploratory means to explore some of the diverse ways people experience depression. Again, I am speaking from my own experience, but hopefully, this dialogue will help others afflicted by depression to find opportunities.
We know that depression affects people of all stripes, stages, ages and opportunities. Yet, we compel ourselves to think of depression as dark, lonely corners and pin-striped attire with blank walls and motionless. This is an image of the social stigma attached to depression.
Depression is often accompanied by withdrawing from activities, friends and family. In severe cases, this can lead to total isolation and sometimes suicide. Yet, in these moments, some of the world’s greatest minds have found unique, perhaps utterly artistic or genius, explorations of science, mind and body as a result (sometimes directly). Some may consider this condition to be their “lot in life” as a result of poverty or some other tragedy in life and yet, do nothing to treat this. For many, these tragic experiences appear to come in multiples rather than as singular events.
I knew that there were different ways of thinking and treatment available. Depression could be a chemical or psychological condition, but there are emotional and spiritual elements that do not want to let go of the pain. I am also conscience of the idea that some of these professional “treatments” are destructive beyond the bad feelings to some people.
Aside from treatments, some believe that altering these feelings (specifically medicinally) as altering ones’ very being into some anatomic state of “normalcy”. Yet with this idea, we can wonder if the goal of treatment is to rid the world of ideas that could transform the society into merely something different. Artistic expression and apparently un-orthodox ideas may provoke others to improve society when the person holding the ideas could not understand the value of oneself. When you can hear your mind debating the merit of basic activities, complex ideas of physics, social behavior, or political systems may seem easy to comprehend in ways that some have never considered.
For these reasons, among many, I have become willing to speak out about some things that should be said. In some ways, I figured I had nothing to lose by issuing but I know the current process was making my condition much worse. The result has seen measurable process and management improvements. In my mind, maybe someone else or the whole company could find improvements rather than ignoring the issues.
The path of realizing one’s own pain journey may find many others also wounded as well because they happen to be in the path of the depression when the suffering person does not realize the pain they are pushing onto others. I know that I inflicted pain upon people when they appeared to “attack” at the core of my wounds instead of relieving them. Illusions can give someone many wrong emotions and impressions of what people are doing. Nevertheless, I cannot apologize enough to those whom I have injured regardless of how wrong or right I was.
I know, too well, what it is like to sit and to stare aimlessly and wonder if anyone cares or if anything matters. I know that most people go about their business in life and do not worry themselves about these things. Worthlessness is powerful feeling that bleeds enthusiasm away from your soul and into despair. Whitman's words, "The question, O me! so sad, recurring-What good amid these, O me, O life?", but without an answer. Yet, depression seems as a way, if anything for those able to tolerate the impacts, have become somewhat “resilient” regardless of how much we hide from it.
I agree with Andrew Solomon in a TED talk where he states, “Depression is so exhausting. It takes up so much of your time and energy, and silence about it, it really does make the depression worse”. Without intervention or treatment, that time consumed by depression is more exhausting and extensive. In his same address, he talks about how amazing that depression can be alleviated by people in most ridiculous ways “standing on your head” and only depressed people would understand or try just to alleviate their own affliction (that no matter how goofy the idea, you would be willing to give it a try.) Even an atheist may be willing to ask for divine intervention to escape from the torments, the horrors or from just being miserable.
I, like Mr. Solomon, agree to be grateful to be alive and that we live in the right time for figuring out depression. For me, I can see pictures of family and can see the pain in the eyes and wished I would have been able to help. Maybe, I could have understood more about my own torment.
Depression has been here and is here. Depression is more than occasional bad feelings but is a perpetual perception of being lost and useless with nothing you can do to change direction. Everything seems to have more negative effort and events can provoke awkward responses. Intoxicants can amplify this impression and people around the depression (guilty or not may be injured.)
Again, if you feel you need help, do not be afraid to seek help. If you know someone who needs help, let them know who you are in their life. Life is meant to be lived and hopefully through the struggle that some of us with depression have, we find dignity in the simple work we conduct or simply that we have meaning in this world for the people that count upon us. Let your light shine (Matthew 5:16)!
